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DAD-OF-8 / Unpublished Article - Page 2 of 3

 

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Foster Care to Adoption "The Greatest Adventure"

by dad-of-8 & all 8 of the kids        PAGE 2 PAGE 1 PAGE 3  

You had an active part in helping take care of many of the kids that were placed in our home as foster kids. How would describe these kids?

GIRL#1's answer:
Of all the kids I helped take care of, there was a lot, each child was different, special, and unique in there own way. All of them wanted to be in a safe, loving, trusting environment. Somehow, if only for a while, we all became brothers and sisters - a family - whether a kid was with us for a couple of days, weeks, months, or years.

BOY #2 - A handsome, talented 25 year old young men. A college graduate that is currently an associate producer of a nationally televised talk show. He is living in his own apartment, within a mile from us. He came to the house as a foster child at 2 years of age. Became the first child that we adopted a few years later. His question:

How do you handle the fact that you have been adopted, with friends, with members of your biological family that you have contact with, and with business associates?

BOY #2's answer:
Being adopted was a gift from someone one above. I guess you can say if I was not adopted where would I be today.  Since the age of two I looked at my adopted parents as my biological Mother and Father.  I was never really affected with the transition of leaving my biological parents.  I just continued to move forward with my life and be happy that I had two people who loved me like I was their own child.  Throughout elementary school to high school I was never questioned about being adopted.  However, I never kept it secret.  Sometimes teachers would ask me how many brothers and sisters are in my family?  I would always reply, "I have three brothers and four sisters and mother and father and also my dog buttons".  My family was larger than the Brady Bunch.  My adopted parents always strived for the best for me and my siblings. 

At the 18 years old I graduated from high school and was offered a scholarship to play volleyball for an NCAA second division school.  My major at the time was Law and my minor was radio and television. Four years later I graduated from college and landed a job in television for a national talk show.  I have been at this job for four years now and I love it.  It has been another successful experience in my life. As far as my friends and co-workers, I never really had a hard time telling them I was adopted. In fact they are jealous that I have such a large family.  My Mother and Father have never turned there back on me. They have always here for me whenever I needed them. As far as my brothers and my sisters they are blood to me.  I guess you can say I have accomplished a lot since age two. However, I could not do it with the support of my adopted parents and my siblings. If I was not adopted I would not know where I would be today....

GIRL #2 - A charming 24 year old. Currently attending college in the evening and working full time during the day in a well known pre-school chain. Intends to help children by becoming a special education teacher. She is currently living at home. Was in and out of our home on several occasions before she eventually stayed to become adopted. Her question:

How have you been able to emotional overcome the feelings that come from being rejected by your biological family?

GIRL #2's answer:
To be honest I don't know if anyone ever fully gets over being rejected by your biological parents. I mean, they are the people who gave you life and then they decide that they don't want to keep you. I believe that if two people are ready to have sex then they should be ready for the responsibility of taking care of a child. It hurt me very much that my parents rejected me.

It hurt me that my father did not want me, but, not that much. I
never really knew him. So, you can't miss what you never knew. I knew my
mother and I loved her. My mother told me when I was ten years old that she
did not want me around. Can you imagine a ten year old girl hearing that
from her mother? For a while I cried and wondered if there was something
that I can do to change and maybe then she would want me around. I soon
realized that it wasn't me, it was her. She was not ready to be a parent.

The best thing that my biological parents could have done for me,
was to reject me. I have to thank them for that. I was given a chance at a
normal, happy life. I consider the people who adopted me as my real parents. They have always been there through the good times and the bad. That is what parenting is all about, unconditional love.

BOY #3 - A 15 year old young man that is a pleasure to have as a son. He came to our family straight form the hospital a few days after birth. Never left and became adopted a few years thereafter. He is already taller than me and I have no doubt much smarter. While extremely shy, he is overcoming that and I fully expect he will have a bright future. His question:

Do you remember and did you enjoy the many foster kids that came and left our house as you were growing up?

 

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